Especially for the Unmarried
“Not going to college? Why? Why are you staying at home? What do you do all day? How can you prepare for your future without a degree?”
It seems every young woman who decides to forego the expected path of life after high school (i.e. college) faces a wave of these questions in one way or another. In most circles, it’s viewed as strange, or even shocking for a girl to remain at home till marriage.
But are we really being deprived by this choice?
Too often the emphasis is placed on everything we miss by choosing not to leave home before marriage. Little is said about the blessings we receive by choosing home over college. At one time I believed those very ideas, that staying at home wasn’t worth it. Since then, God has changed my thinking as I submitted to His plan for my life.
Please understand, I am not purposing to belittle or judge those that choose college. Rather I hope to help and give encouragement to those who, like me, have chosen to forego four years of higher education.
Allow me to relate some things that I have seen and learned through my choice to be a stay-at-home daughter.
How often I have been blessed by being my mother and father’s helper! The Bible speaks the truth when it says it is more blessed to give than to receive (Act 20:35). There are so many times my parents need help, whether in cooking dinner or mowing the lawn, or holding a board in place so it can be nailed. Again and again I am given opportunity for service to my family. There are so many ways service is needed in my home, I cannot imagine what people mean when they say “But staying at home is boring!”
Many people in my church always need help, and it is a blessing when someone is be available to serve. Whether it is within a particulary church ministry or just plain cleaning up, there is always something to be done! I am currently leading the school-age children in my church in singing each Sunday before they dismiss into Sunday school. I encourage every young woman at home, if she is able, to seek out ways to help in the church. The ministry opportunities are countless.
Relationships To Family
I have seen my relationships grow so much during this time of being at home. My brother, Tim, has become a good friend. My mother and I are closer than we were before. Even my father and I are closer as a result of my being at home.
Oh, dear sisters who choose to stay home, do not underestimate what God can do for you and your family during this time! He can grow you and your family closer together than you ever imagined. Be willing, be available, and be ready!
Relationship To God
Oh, where to begin! I am enjoying such sweet communion with my blessed Savior during this time. I love studying His Word and learning of Him. My prayer life has broadened and matured tremendously. There are so many wonderful books written by mature believers I have relished reading, and I am gathering insights through their many years of growth in the Lord. I wouldn’t trade all of this for ten degrees!
In conclusion, stay-at-home daughters, remember that this season of your lives is a time to enjoy and make use of! If it is the Lord's will, you will have that blessing of marriage, but cherish this free time for service. Cherish this time of learning to know God, sitting at His knee as He teaches and instructs you through His word and the wisdom of others. Be grateful for the training session He gives you--not only as you learn how to run a house, but as you learn to depend on Him. Oh, do not suppose that you can be the wife He wants you to be without a deep dependence upon and a deep relationship with Him.
I leave you with this quote from Jim Elliot: “Wherever you are, be all there. Live to the hilt every situation you believe to be the will of God.”
May we each strive to live to the hilt this season of our lives!
Two Young Girls at the Piano by Renoir
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