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Especially for the Unmarried
Contentment is necessary for us to remain in a right relationship with the Lord.
Contentment is the exact opposite of covetousness, and covetousness is a sin in the sight of God. Exodus 20:17: “Thou shalt not covet.” In the same way, contentment is one of the evidences of a right relationship with God. I believe it to be one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit.
Galatians 5:22-23: “But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, self-control: against such there is no law.”
Covetousness is lacking self-control in the area of our minds. The Lord tells us that it is possible, and we must have control over our thoughts. “Casting down imaginations; and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5). If we practice self-control with our thoughts, we will be able to have contentment in our everyday lives.
Contentment is a witness to those who have not the saving grace of God in their lives.
The world lives for pleasure. They spend all their time trying to find things to give them fulfillment, but they are never quite satisfied. That is because true contentment is found only in the Lord.
1 Peter 3:1 “…If any obey not the word they also without the word may be won by the conversation (conduct) of the wives; While they behold your chaste conversation (conduct) coupled with fear.” It does not only apply to husbands; you can also think of it in the sense of a witness to all unbelievers. They are all watching our conduct, and if they see rebellious daughters who only grudgingly submit, what will they think? I’ll tell you. They’ll think “Well, who needs that? My own kids are that way. How is Christianity any better?”
As selfish, sinful human beings we have a natural inclination to want our own way. When we do not get what we want, we become sulky. Whether this is manifested by displaying frustration, temper, trying to find fulfillment in other things, or just the ever faithful bouts of depression, discontentment always results in behavior that is not pleasing to the Lord. The Lord understands the selfish human tendency to cry for what we want and then not be fully satisfied when we get it. That is why He promises to supply all of our needs, not all of our wants. “But my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19).
Does that mean that God is stingy or doesn’t like us to have good things? Certainly not! If you really stop to think about it, most of what we want is not really something that we need. Probably it is not even good for us. James 4:3: “Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.” If a child cried for something that we knew was harmful for it, and became angry because it did not receive what it wanted, would you not smile at its foolish ignorance? Yet how often do we do that with God? “And having food and raiment let us therewith be content” (1 Timothy 6:8).
In the Bible we are taught to deny the natural flesh and in its place welcome the supernatural. The supernatural sanctification of Jesus Christ is what I am speaking about. It is not natural for us to produce the fruits of the Spirit. It is not natural for us to love our families, to be unselfish with our things, unselfish with our desires, unselfish with our time. It is the work of the Holy Spirit, and when we allow it to be His work, that is when it becomes so easy. People make the grace of God too complicated. The grace that goes with sanctification is there for us at any time; we have simply to ask. “You ask and receive not *because you ask amiss that you may consume it upon your lusts.”
Do not ask for what you want to come to pass,; ask for the things of eternal value, the things that will benefit others, the things that will help you to know your Savior better. Wisdom, grace, love, femininity, godliness, hunger for God’s Word, intelligence to understand it and share it with others--even ask God Himself to draw you into a closer relationship with Him. A young man who is a friend of ours recently graduated. He put it this way in his graduation speech:
“All the time I say, “'God, I want this,' or 'God, I need that. I guess I should stop with 'God, I need.' Because, that’s all I need.”
There is nothing good that God will withhold from you. Matthew 7:7: “Ask, and it shall be given you, seek, and ye shall find, knock: and it shall be opened unto you.” The meaning of Psalms 37:4 (“Delight thyself in the Lord and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart”) is not “God will give me whatever I want whenever I ask for it.” If you are truly delighting in the Lord, then your desire will be to further God’s purposes, and the things you ask for will be things of eternal value.
“Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. And let us not be weary of well doing; for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially into them who are of the household of faith” (Galatians 6:7-10).
If you desire to serve the Lord, realize that the greatest ministry we can have has already been given to us in the form of our family. Often it can be easier to go on a missionary trip or serve outside the home than it is to minister to your own family. That is because you are forced on a daily basis to treat them as Christ would and show them His love.
“I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called, With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love, Endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:1-3).
A contented spirit adds much to the happiness of those around you.
Discontentment is serving self, and, as you know, self does not like to serve others. There is nothing so repulsive as a young lady who will not be pleased. You may lay yourself out entirely for her enjoyment and, as payment for your pains, extract only a half-hearted smile.
Family suffers most from this fault in character. When a girl is so absorbed in the distastefulness of her situation, she hasn’t time to consider the problems of those around her. Father may be burdened with business; Mother, trying to support him but having to balance the house and children as well. Do you seek to lighten the load, not only when it is convenient but also when there are things you would much rather be doing? Or is it that your eyes are so fixed on the fact that your own heart is yearning to be fed that you neglect to do much more than is required?
Brothers and sisters come with their own little cares--a broken toy, a torn doll's dress, or perhaps they just want some attention. What happens? Impatience--“I’m busy”--and, worse, ignoring the situation, which causes hurt and frustration in those who are to be dearest.
Daughters and sisters are relied upon for their tender sympathy and comfort.
Encouragement is a special ministry given to us as young ladies, and we cannot neglect the special trust that is ours to use for the benefit of others! Doing so results in gray weather for everyone around us. Is not the saying true, “ A faithful daughter and sister is the sunshine of the home?”
Will anything change when it is your husband, instead of your father, who solicits your help? Or perhaps there will be no soliciting. Someone once said that a wise daughter will anticipate her father’s needs and meet them with enthusiastic service. How can you anticipate when you cannot even see a need?
Throw back the drape of self-absorption,
That dims the room of needs unshown,
And let the light of true perception…
Reveal their face, that they be known.
~ Author Unknown
Proverbs 31:27: “She looketh well to the ways of her household.” That means meeting emotional needs as well as the physical. We must find contentment at its true source so that the needs of others, which have been given us as a special ministry, do not go unnoticed.
Seanna Hollinger is a homeschool graduate who lives with her family and enjoys serving the body of Christ. Seanna hopes to pursue an interest in writing and sharing a vision of beautiful womanhood with other young women in her community.
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