Okay, Ladies—let’s talk. It’s time
to drag this idea of organization out of the shadows, dust it off, and
take a good look. We know we need “it” but we aren’t sure where to get
“it” or how to keep “it.” We see a friend or acquaintance with “it,”
and we wonder how she does “it.”
Why
does organization seem so difficult? We long for order out of our
chaos, but the whole thing seems to elude us at times. If we could just
grasp “it” long enough to show some positive progress, we would feel
hope for long-term solutions to our dilemma.
Each
of us fights a private battle with organization. Do you lack training?
Do you have lazy habits? Do you have a rebellious spirit toward your
role in the home? Are you just too busy juggling too many balls? Is
school time or your use of a particular curriculum crowding out other
important tasks because you fear that you won’t provide a good
education for your children? Have you forgotten your priorities? Maybe
you’ve never sorted out your priorities; consequently, you jump from
one task to another, leaving unfinished jobs strewn from one end of the
house to the other. Whatever your particular nemesis, you may be tired
of the fight and you yearn for peace and order in your home.
If
you desire that order, you have come to a profitable place for change.
As in anything you do, you have to want the results or it just won’t
happen. My experience has shown me that there is no one “right” system
for everyone, but there are certain principles that help all of us, no
matter what battle we fight.
When
all around you is falling apart, you must begin small, taking one
baby-step at a time. Begin at the beginning with the ABCs of order.
Acknowledge Your Successes and Failures
Despite
your feelings, you probably are doing some tasks well. Identify those
things and examine why you are successful in those areas. Even if you
see only one thing, look at it and ask yourself these questions: Do I
like doing this particular thing? Am I good at it, and do I feel
successful when I do it? Is this an easy task for me?
For
example, you may love to cook. You love to create new dishes that are
nutritious and tasty. You enjoy experimenting with recipes, and you
seldom use one exactly as it is written. Possibly you serve several
“famous” dishes that everyone raves about. Experiencing the joy of
seeing your family savor a wonderful meal that you have prepared for
them makes homemaking worthwhile to you. However, your home is falling
down around you—the laundry piles higher every day, green rings
decorate your toilet bowls, and you would rather throw a shirt away
than sew on a button.
You obviously
have applied your creative spirit to your culinary skills and have
experienced success with that area of your responsibilities.
Congratulate yourself for that ability and keep up the good work!
Remind yourself that you do some things well.
Now,
look for ways to carry that same creative bent to the things that you
enjoy less. Decorate your bathroom by hanging fresh curtains and some
lovely pictures. Use a pretty tray to keep items neatly on the bath
counter. Add a picture of your husband or your children to smile at
each morning as you get dressed. (One of my favorite pictures sits on
my bath counter.) It is harder to leave that green toilet ring when
your bath is pretty and inviting.
If
the mending stares at you but you would rather put off doing it, try
gathering all your supplies into a pretty basket large enough to hold
them, plus a few mending items. Place the basket next to your chair in
the family room (or on a shelf nearby, if you have young children who
love to rummage through things like baskets). When you sit down in the
evening, pick up the mending while a family member reads aloud or the
children relate their day to Dad. Tackling one or two items quickly is
easier than facing a large stack of mending at one time.
Accept
the fact that you can do some tasks better than others. Admit your
weaknesses and look for ways to improve in those areas.
Build a Basic Routine
If
you often jump from one task to another without finishing anything or
you feel as though you don’t know where to start on most days, you need
a basic routine. Your creative spirit may bristle at the thought of a
“schedule,” but a simple, doable framework frees you and allows time to
accomplish the basics.
Make a weekly
routine based on a predictable sequence rather than on certain minutes
or hours to do what you need to do. A simple routine that you stick to,
even for part of your day, is the single most helpful thing you can do
to restore order to your home. After all, it was skipping those basic
responsibilities that brought about the chaos in the first place.
A
simple, skeleton routine that allows for housework time, play time, and
school time allows you freedom to be flexible while still maintaining
order and a generally clean and tidy home. If you keep it simple, you
will find more time to do other activities without sacrificing your
home on the altar of the urgent.
Evaluate
each room in your home, deciding which things are most important to
accomplish and which could wait, if necessary. Write those things down
on paper as you walk through your home. Then use the list to establish
your routine. You and your family must grocery shop, cook meals, wash
dishes, do laundry, clean floors, and make beds—or at least change
sheets occasionally. You may want to include a daily pick-up time to
help keep clutter to a minimum. Include anything else that helps you
maintain your home at a reasonable level of functionality.
Put
your routine on paper, marking blocks of time each day for activities
such as housework and chore time, school time, fun time, and any
particular commitments such as music lessons, sports practices, and so
forth. Post the routine where the family can see it, and stick to it as
much as possible. Remember that you don’t have particular hours or
minutes to do things, rather you have blocks of time to accomplish the
necessary tasks—chores after breakfast, school time after chores, and
library trips on the days you take the children to music lessons, for
example. If an emergency shifts your routine, just go back to the
basics as soon as you are able. Assign chores to each of your children
old enough to do them, and supervise to see that they complete what you
expect of them.
Most important, don’t
overplan. If you stay too busy with multiple activities, you won’t have
time to teach your children to work and to maintain your home in a
God-honoring way—not perfect, but presentable.
Continue to Change
Motherhood,
homemaking, parenting, and teaching children are not for wimps! Those
jobs are difficult and require continual learning and adjusting. I
don’t know anyone who has ever accomplished all of them perfectly.
Change
is difficult, isn’t it? If you haven’t done well in keeping your home,
determine why and then work on that particular problem. Your example of
a commitment to persevere will teach your children to keep going when
things are hard and to continue to learn and grow in all areas of their
lives.
Don’t be afraid to make changes
in how and when you do things. If something isn’t working, change it.
Find the best method and time for you and your family, and don’t do
something just because your mother did it that particular way. Ask
older women for help and ideas or find a mentor. Scripture tells us
that the older woman should teach the younger woman (Titus 2:3-5), but
we seem to forget that practical admonition in today’s culture. Someone
else who has been where you are often can see problems that you are
overlooking. Don’t be too proud to ask for help.
I’m
so grateful for the new beginnings the Lord provides when needed. He
desires that we work toward homes that honor Him, and we can trust that
He will give us the energy, power, and new beginnings for our tasks.
Praise
Him for your strengths and offer your weaknesses to Him for His
correction and change. The only “it” that matters—and that you need—is
a heart that longs to honor the Lord through your home and a desire to
go back to the basic ABCs, when needed, to accomplish what He has given
you to do.
Marilyn
Rockett is a “graduated” homeschool mom of four grown sons and Mimi to
six homeschooled grandchildren. The Rocketts home taught for fifteen
years before they ran out of sons to teach. Her new book,
Homeschooling at the Speed of Life
(B&H Publishing), to be released in April 2007, provides
organizational helps. Marilyn has contributed articles to many
publications, gives
Minding Your Time Seminars and speaks at homeschool and Christian women’s events. She presents
Passing the Baton Seminars that encourage and teach adults how to effectively mentor. Visit her website at
www.MarilynRockett.com
or contact her at
marilyn@MarilynRockett.com
to learn more. This article originally appeared in
Homeschooling Today's e-newsletter and is reprinted with permission.