Closing the book on open marriage

Posted By on July 12, 2011

A most encouraging commentary from The Washington Post:

The Open Marriage, by Nena and George O’Neill, was published in 1972, as the sexual revolution gathered steam in America. The best-selling book encouraged spouses to “to strip marriage of its antiquated ideals” and, most famously in one chapter, to explore sexual partnerships outside their marriage, if they so desired.

Fortunately, the book has since come to be seen as an antiquated relic of the Me Decade, when all too many men and women put their own desires—in the sexual arena, as in so many other arenas—ahead of the needs of their spouse, their marriage, and their children.

Columnist W. Bradford Wilcox points out that nonmonogamous relationships come with great risks–risks that involve more than just the individual and extend to spouses and children. Encouragingly, more Americans seem to be rejecting the “open” (adulterous) model of marriage:

When it comes to marriage, one of the few bright spots to emerge over the last forty years is increasing public support for sexual fidelity—in both theory and practice. Indeed, social science tells us that married couples who remain faithful to one another enjoy higher-quality marriages, lower rates of divorce, and, yes, higher levels of emotional satisfaction with their sex life. Sexual fidelity also increases the odds that children are born into and reared in a stable, two-parent home.

For all these reasons, and even though Savage is right to point out that fidelity can be a difficult virtue to live, turning the clock back to the swinging seventies is a stupid idea. Better for the sake of adults, children, and marriage as an institution to keep the book closed on open marriage.

Read the entire piece HERE.

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About The Author

Jennie is the wife of Matthew and mother of eleven children, all of whom keep the household bubbling with life, learning, and levity. Jennie co-founded LAF in 2002 with Lydia Sherman and has been delighted to hear from women all over the world who enjoy their femininity and love to cultivate womanly virtues.

Comments

2 Responses to “Closing the book on open marriage”

  1. LindaMA says:

    And no doubt we should accept more varied and not quite so stringent standards of food service hygiene when we dine out as that might strengthen our immune systems?
    Linda Albert

  2. Jenn84 says:

    Jennie, you’d be amazed at some of the more mild things I’ve seen spouses advised to do in order to “help” their marriages. One piece of advice: if your wife is neglecting you, flirt with other women in front of her; this will get her attention, make you look more desirable and fire her up (in a good and sensual way). If your wife threatens to leave you, tell her to get the devil out if she wants to and open a dating profile on your Facebook while you’re still married; these negative displays will also bring her back to you. Or if you’re a woman and your husband won’t get a job and doesn’t realize the house could be sold, no matter how much you nag or drop hints, give him a list of ultimatums to fulfill regarding getting work or ultimately divorce him (be sure to withhold sex until he fulfills a certain number of ultimatums).

    This is the amorality of our world.