Why Young Women Are Exposing Themselves by Dennis Prager

Posted By on March 23, 2010

[Note: This series was voted a Reader Favorite on the “old” LAF, so we’ve moved it over to the new LAF! ~ Ed.]

As much as feminists may disdain the roles of mother or wife, those roles have bestowed power as well as meaning and satisfaction on the vast majority of women in history. When all is said and done, heading a home and being married to a good man are far more satisfying to most women than college teaching or corporate work. The ending of women’s roles has left innumerable women more free to choose their life’s course, but often less happy and, yes, less powerful. Roles empower (as well as constrain) people.

Read the rest of Dennis Prager’s excellent column at the links below:

Part One

Part Two

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About The Author

Jennie is the wife of Matthew and mother of ten children, all of whom keep the household bubbling with life, learning, and levity. Jennie co-founded LAF in 2002 with Lydia Sherman and has been delighted to hear from women all over the world who enjoy their femininity and love to cultivate womanly virtues.

Comments

4 Responses to “Why Young Women Are Exposing Themselves by Dennis Prager”

  1. PepperACat says:

    I understand my comment will not be posted. But please someone listen to me before you delete it. Stop being raped by your husbands because he said you are obligated. Men are not children, and can control their thoughts and move on. Sex is consensual. Sex is something beautiful and it cannot be beautiful if the woman is lying there out of obligation thinking of other things. It is not true unity. And to those of us rape victims, that is the last thing we need, to be used as sexual objects for our husbands who apparently cannot control their urges and they MUST be met to be happy. Women are sexual creatures too, and have high sex drives, especially around age 30. Please, stop the rape.

  2. Your comment really puzzles me, as we don’t advocate anything close to “obligatory sex.” If you click on “sexuality” in the tags, you’ll find a lot of things we’ve posted about the beauties of sex. It’s a gift from God — a pleasurable gift. In fact, the New Testament was radical in its time for showing that women–not just men–had rights to a satisfying conjugal relationship. Read I Corinthians 7:3-5. Then, of course, pop back over to the Old Testament Song of Songs to read about all the joys and pleasures of the marriage bed — pleasures for the woman as well as the man. In fact, this book was considered so explicit that unmarried Jews were not allowed to read it until just before they were ready to marry!

    My husband doesn’t “use me” as a sexual object, but I am very thankful and happy that he finds me attractive and sexually desirable. I feel the same way about him, and that strengthens our relationship year by year. It’s a beautiful, God-designed thing. Rape is a negation of God-given sexual reciprocity and has nothing to do with biblical marriage.

  3. PepperACat says:

    I think my point was that we don’t have an obligation to sex, as that would make me feel like a sex object. Dennis Prager especially talks like this. We owe men for the heroic job they do not jumping on other women because he is sexually frustrated. Sex women do not want is nonconsensual, and any man who would have sex with a woman when she doesn’t feel like it is treating her badly, and certainly Christ would not treat the church that way, which is I guess what Christians say about that. I do appreciate the response, though as a happy ex-Christian I feel like I shouldn’t really be commenting on a site to do with biblical anything. Even when I was a Christian, I was terrified of a wedding night because in marriage I was obligated to give a man sex, when it caused me PSTD flashbacks. So I consider myself lucky that I did not wait for marriage for any sexual activity (not sex) so that I could heal.

  4. Your comment that Prager is saying we “owe” men leaves me scratching my head. I don’t find that in his writings. Instead, what he says flips the coin the other way ’round. By respecting themselves and treating their sexuality as sacred and special, women empower themselves not to be sex objects. At the same time, if the majority of women behave in such a manner, they also help men not to treat women as mere objects. To me, that’s just common sense and an excellent goal — respect and honor between the sexes. No one “owes” this, of course, but it is a wise choice and one that benefits more than just the individual.

    No one has an “obligation” to sex, and the Bible doesn’t teach that anywhere. We all have the ability to choose to be celibate or to choose to have a sexual relationship with another. Men who force women into sex are called rapists and are not pursuing a biblical relationship by any stretch. There are severe penalties in Scripture for men who violate women, and God places a lot of emphasis on the protective barriers around the marriage relationship–barriers to prevent the abuse of the wife (either through direct abuse or through neglect).

    I’m really sorry to hear of your experience with “Christianity.” Sounds like gnosticism to me, and the church has definitely struggled with that and fought against it many times in the past 2000 years. The idea that the body is evil and that we must subdue our passions or use them only “dutifully” is gnostic–not biblical. Again, just reading the Song of Solomon should lay that to rest. A vibrant, equal sexual relationship is depicted in this great book and affirmed in the New Testament by Paul. The man has just as much “obligation” to please the woman, in fact! This is her “conjugal right.” It is by cheapening sex to the point that we have today (random hook-ups with strangers) that we actually create the idea of “obligatory” sex. A woman who doesn’t sleep with a man after one date (or even just a casual “hello” at a party) is considered repressed and backwards in this topsy-turvy culture. I am horrified for high school and college girls who feel like sex is necessary just to get a guy to stick around long enough for a short conversation. That’s degrading and senseless. Men can wallow like hogs in slop in this situation–no obligations to the women they bed and walk away from. The pressure is all on the woman, who is now not only obligated to give away this intimate treasure but also obligated not to bother the chap with phone calls or notes or any other “pressure” to create a longer-lasting relationship. It’s truly mind-boggling to me.

    In a solid, grounded marriage relationship, there is so much room to relax and be ourselves. There’s no obligation to “perform” if we are feeling ill or depressed. We invest in each other in so many ways outside of sex that we have rich avenues for satisfying, life-building conversations and shared work. And because we are committed and nourish our love, there’s no feeling of insecurity that everything will fall apart if sex isn’t spectacular or stereotypically earth-shattering. That is comfort. It doesn’t mean we treat each other like old shoes, either. ;) But it means the pressure is off to try to keep entertaining our spouse for fear of losing him. We have a mutual “obligation” to love one another in good times and bad–but that’s an obligation built on love, genuine care, and tender affection that grows year by year…not upon fear or worry. I’d encourage you to check back into Christianity without all the gnostic tags hanging onto it. Biblical Christianity is vibrant and life-giving–never ugly or force-fed or boxed-in.

    God bless.

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