The No-Kids-Allowed Movement is Spreading

Posted By on July 28, 2011

From Yahoo:

What’s the matter with kids today and why doesn’t anyone want them around? In June, Malaysia Airlines banned babies from many of their first class cabins, prompting other major airlines to consider similar policies.”

Babies. As Christians, we believe God when He tells us that babies are a blessing.

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/parenting/the-no-kids-allowed-movement-is-spreading-2516110

Stacy McDonald of Your Sacred Calling also shares a link to an article about the “brat ban” with these comments:

Society is honestly living out their belief that children are a burden. Sadly, until Christians start “living out” the truth that children are a blessing, society won’t “get it.” This is our fault. We have a responsibility to glorify God when we’re out – it communicates something. Prepare them ahead of time by training them at home and making sure they are dressed decently with their hair brushed etc. when they go out in public.

Of course, there will be the horrifying exception (I had one child with special needs who really struggled with self control), but we can prepare ahead to make it easier for them to behave and bless others.  One simple way is to make sure you don’t go out at nap time. Another is to make sure they eat lunch BEFORE going to the grocery store. Avoid sugar, MSG, and red dye. Train them at HOME before you take them out and do all you can to make it easier for them.

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About The Author

Tiana is blessed to be wife to Christopher and mother to three young children, plus a tiny newborn baby girl, born November 21, 2010. She has a bachelor's degree in Youth Ministry from Moody Bible Institute in Chicago, IL, which she now "uses" as she brings up her children in the nurture and admonition of the LORD, through home education and discipleship. With God's help, she is learning more about what it means to be a godly wife, mother, and homemaker each day. She lives in Wisconsin, but you can visit her on the web at www.godmadehomegrown.com.

Comments

10 Responses to “The No-Kids-Allowed Movement is Spreading”

  1. ElimyAnne says:

    With all due respect, the ban on young children in first class cabins is not part of a movement against children, but a common industry rule. One, might I add, that even families of crew members must abide by.

    Babies are a blessing. But they will likely get disturbed during the flight for the following reasons: pressure changes, turbulence, too many people, time zone changes throwing off their schedules and the mere exhaustion of traveling.

    People treat the airline industry like a glorified bus service. Restrictions have to be put in place because of passengers complete lack of etiquette and respect. Rather than blasting airlines online, why don’t we act like ladies and gentleman-whether we are in first or coach.

  2. Thanks, Emily Ann. I’ve actually been in first class with a child, so I don’t think the rule is across all airlines, but I can understand such a guideline, particularly in those cabins set aside for long-distance sleeper flights. I don’t think anyone here is disputing the right of airlines to set these kinds of parameters for a true “first class” experience. Unfortunately, we have a lot of parents who just aren’t parenting anymore. I think we’ve all seen bratty tantrums/meltdowns in public where the parents just sit there and do nothing. But we’ve also seen situations where a wise parent simply gets up with the child and walks away to a private place to get things under control. To ban all children because of the bad behavior of some seems incredibly misguided. Why not simply establish rules that encourage parents to mind their kids? In restaurants, for instance, it would be easy for upscale/quiet places to have a policy that loud outbursts or tantrums need to be dealt with swiftly and outside the restaurant or the family will be asked to leave. That’s better than assuming all kids are going to behave like animals from the get-go and doesn’t punish the families with well-behaved children. ;)

    Getting back to the airline situation, when our entire family (including nine children) moved to Kenya, we took a seven-hour flight from the US to London, then an eight-hour flight from London to Nairobi. When we got in line at security, the reactions from other passengers were all across the board. We had incredulous stares, disgusted eye-rolling, frowns of consternation, and everything in between. None of these put me off or bothered me, because I knew most people were thinking, “I sure hope I’m not on THAT flight” — picturing nine children tearing up economy class and screaming the entire time. But our children are seasoned travelers and had absolutely no difficulties on either flight leg. (We also had lots of people praying that there would be no air sickness or difficulty getting the littles to sleep!) At the end of the first flight leg, we stayed in our seats until everyone had exited so we wouldn’t block others from getting their carry-on out and disembarking. I can’t tell you how many people stopped to compliment our children on how well-behaved they were and how impressed they were that they could make it through such a long flight. By the end of the second leg, one couple who had been with us from the States stopped to ask how on earth we managed. We smiled and said, “Training and experience.” It would have been insane to stick nine kids on an airliner with no prior experience in sitting still for long periods of time in an upright position. This skill developed over years of long-distance road trips, and we had TONS of tips from other traveling families on how to keep little ones occupied and happy in the car (books, puzzles, games, etc.). As a result, they did brilliantly on both long-distance flights, for which we were so thankful.

    But it really boils down to encouraging parents to actually teach their children these skills rather than creating a “no-kids-allowed” rule for everyone. If kids are never allowed in situations where they have to practice the skills of sitting still, listening respectfully, or learning to talk politely and quietly, then who will bother to train kids in those areas? We’re so amazed that young adults are stuck in a perpetual “adultescence,” yet if we don’t require them to step up and learn to behave from an early age, they aren’t going to magically become responsible, pleasant adults one day. And we’ll have airliners full of screaming kids–LOL!

    Again, thanks for commenting. You are so right about acting like ladies and gentlemen in first class or coach!

  3. Tiana Krenz says:

    I really appreciate you sharing your experience, Jennie. We have never taken any of our children on an airplane, but I’m sure if we did, we’d do a lot of preparation before hand. The fact that we practice sitting quietly in other situations–in church, at the dinner table, etc–no doubt would be helpful.

    One of our favorite restaurants has a sign near the front that simply states: “We love your children and welcome them in our restaurant. For everyone’s comfort and safety, we ask that you keep them with you at all times.” Clear expectations that children will be well behaved I think go a lot further than banning children outright.

    I think it’s an unfortunate juxtaposition that feeds on itself: people don’t value children, so they don’t parent them well, so children behave badly, so people think poorly of children in general, so they value them even less. I think it starts, though, with selfish adults who’d rather do their own thing than invest their time and energy in the life of a child.

    No one wants to be around unruly, screaming, ill-behaved children. Assuming and expecting that all children are this way is another matter.

    Blessings!

  4. MurphyFamily says:

    Tiana,

    It sounds like you have done all the preparation necessary for preparing your children for a long flight should the need arise. Children that are taught to sit quietly in church, at the table, during family Bible reading, in the dentist’s waiting room, etc. are more than ready to sit quiet during a flight.

    I was worried about my seven children when I had to take them on their first flights back in 2009, from Washington State to Virginia. At the time, my oldest was 9 and my youngest was 2 months. My husband was already in Virginia so we enlisted the help of his sister and her 14-year old daughter, to help mainly with the logistics of moving seven young children through the airports, through security, and handling the baggage.

    Our day started around 3 AM, we all were dressed in red shirts and denim pants and skirts. After a 2-hour drive, we arrived at the airport at about 5:30 AM and experienced the same as Jennie: lots of “Oh-no! I hope I’m not on THEIR flight!” looks from other passengers, eye-rolling, whispering and pointing, etc. But the children sat wonderfully quiet during both flights, stood in line for the bathroom very respectfully, and at the end of each flight, we stay seated until everyone else disembarked before we got off. We had many fellow-passengers stop at our seats to compliment the children on how quiet and obedient they were. The captain after the first 5-hour flight even stopped us on our way out to thank the children for being such extraordinarily good passengers and gave them all a token of appreciation.

    The only preparations we made specifically for the long day of travel was: trained the baby on a pacifier to help with air pressure changes, had chewy food for all the children to eat during take-off and landing for the same purpose, we all (even the adults) dressed in red and blue for easy identification in the airports, I made ID tags for each of the children to wear around their neck just in case one should get separated (had their name and picture, our family name and picture, flight numbers and times, and cell phone numbers – mine, Daddy’s, Aunties), brought along sack lunches (Yes, purposefully msg-free, we didn’t need any added headaches or sicknesses that day), and our 9-year old carried a backpack full of “time consumers” in it (new, and therefore, exciting coloring books, reading books, etc.).

    Children who are taught properly in everyday tasks will act properly in extenuating circumstances. Of course, being a mom of now eight children I know there are *always* exceptions, but generally it is true. ;)

  5. That is fantastic, Mrs. Murphy! Our family also wore red shirts for the long-haul flights and walks through the airports. It really worked to keep us all together. Sounds like you made the same preparations we did–good ol’ common sense!

  6. mrsbartley says:

    This is happening because kids act like brats. When I go to the grocery store I listen to my ipod so I can drown out the noise of the screaming kids. They scream like someone is murdering them. This attitude toward children will only grow worse until parents take the time to raise their children properly. My two girls ages 4 and 5 years, have NEVER thrown a temper tantrum in the store. Why? Because we don’t let them throw temper tantrums at home. We want to encourage young married couples to have kids, but all they see around them are brats. Who wants a brat?

  7. Very true, Mrs. Bartley. See all the rest of the comments above on this topic!

  8. Janey says:

    The problem is not with children, but with parents. I love children, but NOT at an expensive restaurant or at the movies. When one of my children misbehaved or got even slightly loud at a restaurant either my husband or I would take the noisy child outside. Same with the movies. Even if it was a children’s movie, one of us would take the noisy one out to the lobby. Parents today have no respect for anyone else and that is the reason for so many bans against children.

  9. Kara says:

    It really is true that you have to train them first. Not too long ago, we were looking for a place to eat in an unfamiliar town, and saw an Italian place that from the outside looked a bit dinky, but we were hungry, so we stopped there. Turned out they were rather upscale once you got inside. So, we ended u p eating dinner in this super nice restaurant with a two year old and a 6 month old. We got a few stares, glares and eye rolls as well. We asked for a spoon for the baby to play with, and I always have crayons and paper for my daughter. Something like that was completely unplanned, so they had no prior training for it besides normal “you live in a house with people, you will act like a human” training, and they did great.

    I agree a lot of it is the parents, and our society in general. We dont treat eachother with respect, or teach it to our children. So our children dont show respect to anyone, and do whatever they want.

  10. It is a sad day, indeed, when dogs get more respect than children. :(

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